X-posted in Note_to_Cat
Feb. 19th, 2006 01:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
aamusedinatxDear Lardbutt,
Yeah you...22 lb lazy bum. You cry and hiss and generally pull a mule on every time the dork dog goes near your crunchies. So I clear a space, place your food up where you can reach it and she can't. I even give you PERMISSION to get up on that section of the kitchen counter to eat and what do you do?
You crouch down on the floor and hoover through HER crunchies. Then you get mad when she comes over and noses you away without so much as a growl.
It's not HER fault you don't like gravity and hate to launch your fat ass up off the floor to the counter top. You can do it and on first try too--I've seen you! You're just too lazy.
Know what, I'm putting all the food back on the floor again. You can fight your own fight. Maybe it'll trim you up a bit. Welcome to Darwin's world my Sammykins!
Love,
Your fed up nutritional substance dealer
aka MOM
Yeah you...22 lb lazy bum. You cry and hiss and generally pull a mule on every time the dork dog goes near your crunchies. So I clear a space, place your food up where you can reach it and she can't. I even give you PERMISSION to get up on that section of the kitchen counter to eat and what do you do?
You crouch down on the floor and hoover through HER crunchies. Then you get mad when she comes over and noses you away without so much as a growl.
It's not HER fault you don't like gravity and hate to launch your fat ass up off the floor to the counter top. You can do it and on first try too--I've seen you! You're just too lazy.
Know what, I'm putting all the food back on the floor again. You can fight your own fight. Maybe it'll trim you up a bit. Welcome to Darwin's world my Sammykins!
Love,
Your fed up nutritional substance dealer
aka MOM
